HAPPY SEPTEMBER and welcome to our updated Monthly Newsletter. Communication is always important, and we want to make sure you're hearing about all the great events and groups available each month, as well as staying up-to-date on the issues we're facing in the Capital Region and in New York State. We hope you'll take advantage of the printable version that will be attached each month to not only read the content and join in our events, but to share broadly in libraries, schools, and at other community-based organizations.
As we do this work, it can be difficult to leave the pain of it all behind. We've seen strides to move the needle forward for marriage equality and protecting transgender students, only to watch a new world of radical leaders compare a GSA (gender and sexuality alliance) at school to NAMBLA (look it up), purposely misunderstand and distort the truth about gender diversity, and an entire state erase queer existence from their schools with their hateful "Don't Say Gay" bill. How do we revel in our successes without losing traction on the very active policy landscape criminalizing our existence? We start with radical queer joy.
Queer people are not self-replicating. Two gay parents do not inherently give birth to a gay child. A trans dad can't guarantee they will give birth to a transgender child. When we reach out to each other to create community, we are truly building family.
This fall, please build and strengthen your community of support. Invite a few new folks to the Aging with Pride cruise on September 23rd, join our Queer by Nature series (coming soon) to spend time each month learning and exploring with other LGBTQIA+ folks, watch season two of Heartstopper and remind yourself that there doesn't always need to be a shoe that drops; we can exist without tragedy and within an abundance of joy and we already have the people and places to do it.
Nathaniel Gray
Executive Director
Pride Center of the Capital Region
On June 12th, 2023, the New York State Education Department (NYSED) released guidance titled “*Creating a Safe, Supportive, and Affirming School Environment for Transgender and Gender Expansive Students: 2023 Legal Update and Best Practices.”* This guidance highlights the various steps schools can, and in certain circumstances should, be taking in order to create safe and affirming school environments for transgender and gender-expansive youth.
According to NYSED, 56% of LGBTQ+ students in New York reported harassment based on their gender expression, and more than half reported at least one form of anti-LGBTQ+ discrimination at school during their prior school year. NYSED also shares the adverse educational, social, and health consequences related to LGBTQ+ discrimination faced by students in school. These adverse consequences include lower GPA and self-esteem, higher rates of truancy and avoidance of school functions, and a heightened risk of experiencing depression, anxiety, and thoughts of suicide.
NYSED’s guidance shares suggestions for educators regarding students who come out at school, and would like to be referred to with a different name, pronouns, or both. This suggestion calls attention to the dangers of sharing a student's identity or orientation with their parents **WITHOUT** the child’s knowledge or permission to share this information. In our experience of providing LGBTQ+ youth resources, The Pride Center is aware of the unintentional harm that can be inflicted on a young person by “outing” them to parents or caregivers who are not affirming, accepting, or allowing of their identity, expression, and/or orientation. NYSED specifically states that the schools act in a role of support and the student is in charge of their gender transition.
Further, “misgendering/deadnaming” (intentionally referring to a person by the name or pronouns they explicitly do NOT want to be referred to) is unacceptable behavior according to New York State law. The New York State Human Rights Law has included protections for sexual orientation and gender identity since 2003 and 2019, respectively, and the Division of Human Rights has identified misgendering/deadnaming as grounds to file for discrimination in New York State. The Pride Center is disappointed to see that Senator Walcyzk, of the 49th New York State Senate District, recently released a press statement regarding the NYSED guidance. The Senator remarked on the “criminality of misgendering,” belittling the harm that is done to transgender students at a time when suicide is the second leading cause of death for all teens, and transgender youth are five times more likely to do so than their cisgender peers. The Senator also stated that NYSED was “...interested in grooming students…” regarding their issuance of this guidance. To more finely make his point, when efforts to acknowledge that LGBTQ+ people exist, especially around children, a common assertion is that they are being groomed, and often the accusation is one of a sexual nature. This common trope not only harmfully mischaracterizes LGBTQ+ visibility as something to protect children from (despite being shown to lower suicide rates), it’s dangerously close to slander/libel to accuse teachers, social workers, or parents of criminal behavior for acknowledging LGBTQ+ existence to kids.
We thank NYSED for issuing this guidance to school districts across the state, sharing ways to better protect students who identify as transgender, gender non-conforming, and non-binary. The Pride Center acknowledges that NYSED’s guidance is not enforceable and mostly seeks to explain New York State law regarding protections for LGBTQ+ youth. It lies in the hands of the school districts to implement, update, and train on these policies and procedures to be accountable to the needs of their students. While the metropolitan and suburban areas of New York State hold many of our LGBTQ+ youth, we know queer youth are born and raised in rural New York as well. We must hold our elected officials, resource providers, school staff and personnel accountable for making New York State safer for our LGBTQ+ youth, especially those in rural New York State.
STATEMENT ON NYSED GUIDELINES
Sadly, also on July 29th, in Midwood, Brooklyn, New York City, O’Shea Sibley- a 28-year-old, black gay male dancer, originally from Philadelphia- was murdered by a 17-year-old individual. This individual demanded that Sibley and his friends stop voguing at the gas pump in front of a Mobil gas station at around 11 p.m. on a Saturday night. O’Shea, a dancer who had worked with the Ailey Company, was voguing with his friends while they listened to the album RENAISSANCE when this altercation began, the assailant hurling homophobic slurs at O’Shea and his friends for living authentically. O’Shea’s death is a result of hatred. Period. The anti-LGBTQ+ movement that has been sweeping the country this year, flooding our states with more anti-LGBTQ+ legislation than ever before, and labeling queer folks as pedophiles, groomers, and deplorables is killing our LGBTQ+ siblings. We are deeply saddened at the loss of a vibrant and joyous life.
Homophobia, transphobia, and LGBTQ+ hatred are not born, though. It is taught; the notion that queer people are bad people is embedded in the very fabric of our national narrative on a regular basis. If schools and school officials are allowing discrimination and harassment to happen within their walls, and they are, they are breeding grounds for the learning of homophobia, transphobia, and bigotry in general. We see this ever present in the murderer who took O’Shea’s life. This individual was 17 years old, a child, probably a student, and absolutely taught to hate our community, not born with that intention.
O’Shea was murdered while living authentically, openly, and publicly in a city home to one of the largest queer populations in the world. If living authentically in a place like New York City can hold a death sentence, what does the rest of New York State, the rest of the country, look like for LGBTQ+ folks living authentically? We stand with other New York State organizations in asking for justice in the case of O’Shea Sibley, and protections for our LGBTQ+ New Yorkers moving forward. This incident is not isolated, and we are seeing an increase in LGBTQ+ violence in 2023 so far. The Pride Center of the Capital Region is also donating funds raised through the sale of our Pride T-shirts from our 2023 “Black Trans Lives Matter” campaign to O’Shea Sibley’s memorial fund, which is linked below and is organized by Sibley’s father, Jake Kelly, and Sibley’s former dance organization, the Ailey Organization.
STATEMENT ON O'SHAE SIBLEY
On July 29th, in Queens, New York, Beyoncé was performing the first of two sold-out nights of the RENAISSANCE world tour in New York City. The album has been called a love letter to the Black, queer community. The album has also been an authentic vehicle, unlike Madonna’s *Vogue*, for the ballroom scene to showcase an art form that was invented by and has been a lifeline for the BIPOC queer community; who continue to experience disproportionate violence and marginalization compared to their white, LGBTQ+ counterparts.
GO FUND ME ACCOUNT
Laura Ann Carleton was a mother to 9, a wife, and a staunch LGBTQ+ ally and advocate. LGBTQ+ folks and their allies are being murdered for living authentically and standing up to bigots when that authenticity is questioned.
STATEMENT ON LAURA ANN CARLETON
Hatred was the motive in Carleton’s murder. The continued national rhetoric around LGBTQ+ folks- especially transgender and non-binary individuals- and the barrage of anti-LGBTQ+ legislation is leading to an increase in violent hate crimes. Just two weeks ago we shared about O’Shea Sibley, a young, black, gay male who was murdered when standing up in the face of bigotry.
The Pride Center of the Capital Region stands in solidarity with the Cedar Glen community and the family that Lauren Ann Carleton has left behind. It is apparent in this past year just how much further we have to go to achieve LGBTQ+ equity, especially in our rural parts of America.
On Sunday, August 20th around 5 PM in the rural mountain community of Cedar Glen, CA, 66-year-old Laura Ann Carleton was pronounced dead by police outside her boutique, Mag.Pi. Laura suffered a gunshot wound from the suspect who, according to police “made several disparaging comments about Carleton’s rainbow flag” flying outside her shop, ripping the flag down and causing Laura to come outside and confront the suspect. The police later found the suspect and, after a “lethal force encounter”, the suspect was killed.
MR. BUMBLES CAFE
Doran and his business, Mr. Bumbles Cafe, have been our biggest supporters in this volunteer program, donating over a dozen times in the past year. Jim Larson has crafted, using his networks of supportive community members as well as donating dinners himself, each week to be filled with a home-cooked meal, or delicious take-out. In speaking with The Pride Center’s Program Coordinator, *Tora Stringfield, “The kids look forward to each week now, asking what this week's meal is and what to expect.”* This volunteer program has provided an extra layer of community support for our LGBTQ+ youth group members and the opportunity for the youth to enjoy food they haven’t experienced before.
When asked what their favorite part of creating and organizing this volunteer food program was, Brandon and Jim shared different answers. Brandon shares that being able to see the youth excited and looking forward to seeing Mr. Bumbles Cafe when they provide a meal is something that feels rewarding for him. Brandon highlights that LGBTQ+ spaces weren't around when he was a youth, and seeing this LGBTQ+ youth group at The Pride Center is amazing. Jim shares that seeing how eager the community is to donate their time or resources to providing these meals has been the best part for him, the diversity of the volunteers adds to that. Both of these community members have spent a year of their free time and resources helping feed our LGBTQ+ youth group, and we can’t thank them enough!
Would you like to be a part of the above-mentioned volunteer food program? Reach out to Jim Larson at jalarson@gmail.com.
In 2022, Brandon Doran attended his first Pride Center Business Alliance mixer. Encouraged to join by his friend and Pride Center supporter, Jim Larson, the two left this mixer with the idea to begin donating dinner to the Pride Center’s weekly LGBTQ+ youth group. Doran, the owner of Mr. Bumbles Cafe in Albany, NY, wanted the youth group to have more options for food, healthier options. Over a year later, the volunteer program that Jim and Brandon began has seen over 30 different community donors, including businesses such as Tara Kitchen and Rage Cakes, and even cookouts with Jim at The Pride Center!
Image right to left: Tora Stringfield (she/her), Program Coordinator; Brandon Doran (he/him), Owner Mr. Bumbles Cafe; Jim Larson (he/him)
Brandon Doran (he/him), Owner Mr. Bumbles Cafe
Did you know The Pride Center offers FREE mental health counseling and case management? Provided by LGBTQ+-affirming staff and interns, these essential services are open to all LGBTQ+ folks and allies, ages 10 and up.
Click HERE to find out more and make an appointment.
FREE COUNSELING & CASE MANAGEMENT
SHARE YOUR FAVORITE RESOURCES
LGBTQ+ resources are not always easy to find in the Capital Region. Making sure that you are provided with safe, competent, and affirming services is something we strive for at The Pride Center. Do you have a physician you love? How about a business that always feels affirming or safe? Please share your LGBTQ+ affirming resources with us HERE!
This month’s newsletter is proudly sponsored by Mr. Bumbles Cafe!
THE PRIDE CENTER'S MONTHLY NEWSLETTER AND MONTHLY CALENDAR OF EVENTS ARE ALSO LINKED TO THIS EMAIL FOR ANYONE IN NEED OF PRINTING THE CONTENT.
We encourage our fellow community service providers to print copies of the monthly newsletter and calendar to make available at resource tables and bookstands in their space.
PRINTABLE NEWSLETTER
PRINTABLE CALENDAR
Your contributions enable us to continue delivering services and support to the LGBTQ+ community in the Capital Region and beyond.
Thank you for your tireless support!
